What To Do When The Hardest Part Is Going Home

The worst part of travel isn’t the security checkpoints with prison-issue wands, puffs of air blowing in your face or gloved agents pawing through your belongings. It’s not the airline seats with their lumbar supports that spear your spine or the $2.25 you pay for a small bottle of filtered tap water at airport restaurants.  It’s not the jetlag—which can be so brutal that your left foot doesn’t know where your right foot is walking—or the suitcase that vanished with the travel clothes, gadgets and gear you have spent half a decade assembling.

The worst part of travel is actually coming home. One day you are in Peru, gaping at Machu Picchu or in Quebec City, learning about why the English and the French both coveted the area. Maybe you’ve been cycling in Italy, trekking in Nepal, cruising down the Nile in Egypt, or sauna hopping in Finland. The next day, you open the door to your digs and…chaos.

The answering machine is blinking, there are hundreds or thousands of emails, the snail mail spills over the edge of a huge tub and stares at you from the floor.  There are bills to be paid, deadlines to be met, appointments to be kept. Your hair needs new highlights, your car is due for servicing, there’s a leak in your office, you forgot to send your sister-in-law a birthday gift. The exotic fades as you slip into the quotidian and start trouble-shooting, catching up, returning calls, and squirming in the dentist’s chair.  Hooray! You are home.

I have not yet figured out how to make homecoming a celebration.  But I have a few tips if you are as overwhelmed as I am when you step over your own welcome mat.

1) Even if you are committed to NOT being wired when you travel, try to check your email at least once before the big return.

You will have a good idea of what awaits you and can perhaps forestall a crisis or two.

2) Set the vacation response on your computer before you leave on a trip. It can say something like, “Hi, there. Sorry I will be a continent away from my computer from (fill in the date) to (fill in the end date). I will respond to you upon my return.” This lets folks know that you weren’t ignoring them, and they learn when you will be back so they can re-contact you then.

3) When you set the vacation response, allow yourself a day or two to land. Pick a return date that is day or two after your actual homecoming.

4) Don’t schedule too many things for the first week of your return. Allow yourself to re-acclimate slowly.

5) Do something pleasurable for yourself. A bath in Dead Sea salts. Print out your favorite photos from the trip. Go for a wrap and massage. Go to bed early. The emails will not evaporate if you don’t answer them right away.

6) Tell selected friends and family a few trip highlights, so the memories stay vivid and fresh in your mind.

7) Contact a new friend from the trip and moan a little about how overwhelming it is to come home and how you wish you were back on the trip again.

Bon voyage and bon retour. If you have any other tips for landing softly, by all means let us know. If you get an automated vacation response, you will know that the homecoming was too much, and we’re on the road again.

Ask The Wild Pair: Mother-Son Vacation

I’d love to take my teenage son on a mother-son vacation. But, he’s pretty anti-mom these days.  It would take something truly high-octane-cool to convince him. Any ideas?

It’s not just you. In case you haven’t noticed, teens tend to prefer parents in small doses, or, if they could get away with it, not at all. Fortunately, there’s no shortage of adventures so awesome that even too-cool-for-mom teens can’t say no. To get you started, we’ve listed just a few recommendations below.

But first, if we may, a word of advice: Reign in any visions of dramatic relationship breakthroughs and heart-to-heart life goal discussions you’re currently entertaining. And go with the intention to simply enjoy the sheer joy of watching your son experience something new and the good fortune of having a few precious days together.

Now, off you go to choose a trip too good to pass up!

Teen Trips Fueled by Adrenaline

Canadian Rockies Family: Mighty Peaks to Mountain Goats – 6 days
With glacier hikes, river rafting, biking, rock climbing and horseback riding, an Austin-Lehman Adventures Banff & Lake Louise vacation is the ultimate family adventure. By day, hike wildflower meadows and national park trails _ even trek across a glacier. Bike serene forested paths around turquoise lakes, raft the playful rapids of the Kananaskis River and ride horses with Alberta cowboys. By night, enjoy a hearty meal and the comforts of a Summit Spa, a wood-burning fireplace, and a claw-foot tub.

Departures: July, August
Activities: Hiking,Biking,Kayaking
Price: $2,898

Costa Rica: Multisport Family Adventure – 9 Days

Explore Costa Rica’s undiscovered wildlands on this active, natural history adventure. With Wildland Adventures you’ll hike through 600-year-old highland cloud forests near Mt. Chirripo, habitat of the Resplendent Quetzal, between lush rain forests and pristine tropical beaches of the Osa Peninsula, and along with a two-day white water rafting trip down the Pacuare River.
Departures: All Year
Activities: Safaris, Wildlife and Photography
Price: From $2,890

Arizona – Grand Canyon Rafting Trip – 6 or 7 Days

In the grandest canyon of the Colorado, experience the excitement, serenity, joy and enchanting beauty of the river with Western River Expeditions as it transforms this divine chasm and those who venture down it. The Grand Canyon is ever-changing, with massive walls that step back to expose eons of natural history, at one place dark and narrow, and at another lush with waterfalls thundering hundreds of feet in luminous free fall.

Departures: May, June, July, August, September
Activities: Hiking,Rafting
Price: From $2,295 per Adult

FIVE THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU ARE TRAVELING

It’s pretty excruciating for many people before they travel. They have to find a home for the dog or cat, close up the house, tell neighbors they are going, get tickets, pack, download boarding passes, remember to turn on the vacation response on their computers. This is not, by any stretch of the imagination, fun.  But once you board the plane….it’s all behind you. Your attention is on the excitement of the trip. And since you have a clear mind with no major worries, here are a few thoughts you might consider while on the road.

 

1) THE ART OF TRAVEL

If you are a collector, you already know that the art world in your destination is your oyster. If the only thing you collect is parking tickets, then there is no better time to start collecting than now. You can start with street art—perhaps a piece from  someone selling wire sculptures on a street corner. You can wander into galleries. Or you can find art in restaurants and coffee houses. Take the plunge. Your first piece may be under $100, and, depending upon what you collect, your 100^th piece may also be under $100.

2) PART WAYS WITH POSTCARDS

You probably have friends and family who say to you, “Send me a postcard from Prague, okay?” Your answer should be, “I would love to, but I really don’t have time when I am on the road.” Why do we suggest you act like a postcard Grinch? Because it can be a hassle to find the right postcard, score a stamp, locate a mailbox or bring the postcard back to your hotel.  In the latter instance, it’s probably creased or soggy after you’ve carried it in your bag or tote all day. If you FEEL LIKE sending someone a postcard, it’s a great reminder to someone back home that you are thinking of her. But an obligation? That’s not what you need on vacation.

3) NO, NO, A THOUSAND TIMES NO

Once you have said “no” to postcards, it’s an easy stretch to saying “no” more often. Of course you want to compromise. Of course you want to be a good travel mate. But don’t say “yes” when you mean “no.” Say “yes” when you mean it and don’t be afraid to turn down an offer or invitation. Do it politely, do it gently, but learn to say “no” on the road to authenticity.

4) ALL THE SOUVENIRS THAT FIT IN PRINT

Almost everywhere you go—hotels, museums, restaurants, attractions—there are brochures and business cards. Avail yourself of them. Instead of having to remind yourself of the name of a hotel or restaurant when you get back home, the card or brochure will do it for you. Ask for an envelope at your hotel and put the cards or thin brochures it in. Label it “contact info.” You will thank yourself when you get back home.

5) THE MOST IMPORTANT ENDORSEMENT

When you are traveling, you are accomplishing new and perhaps difficult things all the time. You are eating fried grasshoppers for the first time. You are speaking German for the first time since high school.  You have a meal alone in a restaurant. You go to your first opera. You forego spending a wad on a pair of shoes and blow it instead on a piece of art. Each time you do something new or challenging, endorse yourself. Recognize that you are growing as a traveler and a human.

The only other thing you have to think of is this: Relax, enjoy and bon voyage from the Wild Pair.